a lot of people told me not to worry, as i will find somebody else better. but the thing is, i wanted it to lasts forever or else i would've find a replacement when i had the chance(s).
a few said that i am better than her but then again it was never a competition. and even if it is, i have lost the game even before i knew it had started. and that is why i'm backing off, because i don't want to be a sore loser anymore.
a friend told me that everybody would go through this kind of experience in life, how naive was i to even thought that i wouldn't face this situation.
another friend said that i am taking things well, but the thing is, she doesn't know what goes around behind the scenes.
i hate it when i'm all alone, because that's when all the unwanted memories come flooding in my head. people say, don't think about it, and trust me i am trying hard not to. but sometimes even the slightest thing could trigger back the memories.
up till today, i'm still figuring out what i did wrong to deserve such fate..i'm sure that i am also to be blamed, it's just that i still don't know what it is. it's not that i'm too ego, thinking that i never did wrong because i believe it takes two to start a fight.
it saddens me when they treat me like i was never part of their lives. it saddens me more when he did the same. i'm amazed that a person could totally erase another person (who he claimed to love) in his life within a short span of time. i guess it was never love in the first place.
if you're thinking that i am still wishing and hoping that things would come back to where it used to, then you're wrong. because what's done is done. i just can't believe that this is happening to me. sometimes i think that i'm living in a dream, and hope that one day somebody would wake me up from this nightmare. it happened so quickly i didn't have the chance to prepare myself when it came.
to be honest, i am exhausted of being in this phase. i want to skip this part of my life but of course that is being immature. people say i'll be happier in the future, but what about the present? mom said there's a blessing in disguise and i'm still figuring what it is.
it saddens me when their reactions were , 'seriously?'
the wound is still fresh and i am nursing it slowly. i feel disappointed that he chose this decision. i lost my so called best friend. nobody to ask me how i spent my day, nobody to wish me good night, nobody to share my problems with. he decided to play that role for another person. but like i said what's done is done.
a few said that i am better than her but then again it was never a competition. and even if it is, i have lost the game even before i knew it had started. and that is why i'm backing off, because i don't want to be a sore loser anymore.
a friend told me that everybody would go through this kind of experience in life, how naive was i to even thought that i wouldn't face this situation.
another friend said that i am taking things well, but the thing is, she doesn't know what goes around behind the scenes.
i hate it when i'm all alone, because that's when all the unwanted memories come flooding in my head. people say, don't think about it, and trust me i am trying hard not to. but sometimes even the slightest thing could trigger back the memories.
up till today, i'm still figuring out what i did wrong to deserve such fate..i'm sure that i am also to be blamed, it's just that i still don't know what it is. it's not that i'm too ego, thinking that i never did wrong because i believe it takes two to start a fight.
it saddens me when they treat me like i was never part of their lives. it saddens me more when he did the same. i'm amazed that a person could totally erase another person (who he claimed to love) in his life within a short span of time. i guess it was never love in the first place.
if you're thinking that i am still wishing and hoping that things would come back to where it used to, then you're wrong. because what's done is done. i just can't believe that this is happening to me. sometimes i think that i'm living in a dream, and hope that one day somebody would wake me up from this nightmare. it happened so quickly i didn't have the chance to prepare myself when it came.
to be honest, i am exhausted of being in this phase. i want to skip this part of my life but of course that is being immature. people say i'll be happier in the future, but what about the present? mom said there's a blessing in disguise and i'm still figuring what it is.
it saddens me when their reactions were , 'seriously?'
the wound is still fresh and i am nursing it slowly. i feel disappointed that he chose this decision. i lost my so called best friend. nobody to ask me how i spent my day, nobody to wish me good night, nobody to share my problems with. he decided to play that role for another person. but like i said what's done is done.
2 what say you?:
lily!!peah pernah merasakannya...n while reading your entry,peah nangis..mengenangkn nasib sendiri jugak..huuu~sobs..sobs..actually semua org takkan fham ape yg kite rse,tpi atlis when they try to comfort us,we know that still ade kwan2 yg ambik berat yg masih sygkn kita..good luck for ur future dear..LOVE u,fren=)
*hugs*
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